Super

Here is another one from my teenage years. This was me on a good day I guess when my feistier side was showing through, even still I keep referring to myself a little or mini, words I chose to use because feeling small meant there was less of me to be torn apart or picked at.

A little superwoman in disguise,
A little Superchick of the skies,
A little girl low on confidence,
Trying to find her feet again.
A mini person on the land,
Who could do anything she wanted,
But who was squashed,
By those who were her friends.

But now she’s even more than before,
She’s better than them,
Those who were her friends,
She’s a little Superchick of the skies,
A little superwoman in disguise.

Hiding

I’m 26 now,
But sometimes I am still that 15 year old girl,
Who couldn’t breathe at the thought,
Of having to stand up in front of class
With every face turned towards me.
They’d listen politely,
Like they were taught to do.
But none of them would really hear me,
Or see me properly,
Because I’m hiding behind a mask
I’ve been perfecting for you all.

So I may be 26 now,
But that mask still gets used sometimes.
Because people still don’t really hear me,
And they can say it’s because I don’t have experience,
And I’ll say it’s because I’m a woman.
And sometimes that might be true.
But maybe they are not to blame,
Maybe it’s just because I became too good at hiding,
And not good enough at just being me.

Born with Rules

What could you have become,
If left to your own devices.

Before the world pressured you,
Everyone forcing you into a box.

You could have been majestic,
A strong, peaceful warrior.

But they had other ideas for you,
Restrictions you would never fit.

It was all their rules that broke you,
Forcing you to hide away in the dark.

They say they accept everyone as is,
But you were born into their circle,
And they pushed you out.

Scream

What if I scream out loud this time,
How will you react?
If I don’t hide them,
The thoughts in my head.

 

Here it comes,
The outpouring of built up emotions.
Years of repression,
Filling one bullet.

 

Hate eats away at your soul,
So scream,
Let it all out,
Watch the shock on their faces.

 

Is it bad to imagine it,
Walking into that quiet building,
And screaming down the aisles:

“Awake you sleepy people,
The real world has come knocking”.