Be Nothing

“The only way to avoid criticism is to do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.” (Aristotle)

I was nothing,
Nothing and no-one
A zombie running through the motions of life,
Just to avoid a hard word or look,
Dodging the ‘dropped’ book or slammed door,
I became nothing
So you wouldn’t hurt me anymore,
If I say nothing,
You will have nothing to critique,
Right?

Wrong.
Being nothing hurt me worse than you ever could
Because it seeped through my skin
Until I believed it was true
I really was nothing and no-one
And you attacked me anyway
You always found a way
To leave me with new scars
And now I have to battle myself
To remember I’m more than nothing.

Meek as a mouse,
I shrank into the shadows
Became a ghost of myself
Believing I could escape you
Blaming myself for the words you said
Maybe I really was the problem
If I’m less me, you’ll go away
But that didn’t happen.

I almost faded completely,
Trying to fit into your box
And dilute my own personality,
I became nothing
And was told I would always be nothing
But that’s not true
The moment I gave myself a chance
Was the moment I became more than nothing
A hell of a lot more than you could ever imagine.

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